The soothing warm water was showering over me as I rinsed my hair and then there was loud knocking on the bathroom door.  “Mom, the police are here.  They want to talk to you about the incident in Penny’s parking lot.”  “What incident?” I asked.  She didn’t know and went back and I could hear the voices.  I quickly finished and got out.  It was quiet so I called out, “Are they still here?”  “Yes”, a man’s voice answered.  Quickly dressing I went out still combing my wet hair and feeling totally confused.

For the next fifteen minutes as we sat by our beautiful Christmas tree a discussion went on about how our truck driven by a blond woman was reported to have hit a car in the Penny’s parking lot on Saturday.  After the “hit” the woman gave another driver a strange look and then drove off.  At least three times I explained that yes I had been at Penny’s but I didn’t hit anything or give anyone any strange looks.  The officer was strong about the fact that someone would not take the time to get a plate number and report such an incident if it hadn’t happened.  I asked if there was damage and he said the other car just had a minor scrape on the bumper and was not pressing charges.  My daughter came in irate at my being accused of a “misdemeanor” (yes the officer said those words and also added they noted I didn’t have a record!) and said someone must have been mad about not finding a parking place.  Then I remembered I did go back to our truck in the middle of my shopping to get something I had forgotten to take in.  There were cars looking for parking spots, but I didn’t leave my space but just went back in. My daughter further stated we have insurance why would I “hit and run?”  (At that point I asked her not to be involved).  I told him that I never heard any strange sound which might explain having done it and not known and was positive I hadn’t hit anything.  He held his ground and firmly let me know that he was there to warn me that people were watching so I’d better do the right thing.  Flabbergasted I assured him if I had done anything I would have stopped and given my information. He finally repeated the warning for the fifth time and then left wishing us a Merry Christmas.

 

There are no words really.  He was doing his job. But really????  My daughter was upset the rest of the morning and kept saying, “He doesn’t know you!  I can’t believe you went through that.”  OK- some of you are laughing now thinking maybe I really did do it and that my memory and alertness are waning.  You only think that because you are worried about your own!  Well, it’s over and I had a lovely day.  Angels have always been on all four sides and the top of my car when I drive and I figure God will just send an extra one now to protect me from the informant……….

Christmas over twenty years ago after my Dad went to be with the Lord was full of expected emotions.  We were very close and of my parents it was my Dad and I who communicated the most- often meeting after work when I was in high school both getting home very late.  That Christmas however didn’t mark any changes in daily traditions since we lived so far away our families didn’t get together during the holidays.

This year Mom has joined Dad in heaven.  It is different.  For almost 20 years I have shared Christmas with her as she along with her mom moved to Kentucky to be near family.  It wasn’t just Christmas Day or Weekend.  We made things for Christmas Bazaars to sell.  We attended sales, Christmas programs at church and schools, baked for my annual Piano Open House, got excited over new creative ideas, picked photos for the annual card and on and on I could go.  Already this year there is a missing piece in my Christmas puzzle that already on just December 5^th has brought tears to my eyes unexpectedly more than once.

Many of you are experiencing grief already due to the loss of a loved one this year. Della, Jesse, and Carla may God uphold you with His peace on earth!  Laura and Jenni my arms reach out to you across the miles my sweet nieces!  Noni and family you are in my heart every day. There is no right way to go on.  There is no easy way to move forward.  As I know with my Dad there is no time we will ever forget them or wish they were with us to share special times.

Though November is the time set aside to give thanks I have decided as a coping tool that today I am going to begin my Christmas Blessing Journal 2012.  It will stay setting out to write in as they happen and read when the tears come to remind me that God is with me now and will never leave me alone.  Here are my first entries:

1. The joy of my loss is the promise given by God that through His Son whose birth we celebrate and I can look ahead to a family reunion that goes beyond our human comprehension!
2. I have a baby who just turned one living with me this Christmas whose sweetness immediately cures a sad feeling.
3. This is the first year ever I sat on the couch and handed the ornaments I wanted on the tree to my daughter who has created us a masterpiece of colorful happiness!
4. Autumn my granddaughter is creating unique new ornaments to add.
5. Last night I received my first Christmas card handmade by my nieces son which declares, “Happy and Merry Christmas ladies and gentlemen!”

This Christmas journal is already working- I am what a dear friend describes me as- a spoiled rotten brat!  Thank You Lord…………..

“Grandma makes the best pancakes” the granddaughter announced.  “I can make good pancakes”, the aunt said.  “Don’t even go there”, the aunt’s sister advised, “I have tried and tried- it’s just the oil she uses.”  “No it’s not!” the granddaughter insisted, “Grandma just has…the magic!”  I just smile and cook.

 

I remember as a child I was just the opposite.  My grandmother was disgusted that all of us would only eat our mother’s food when having a family gathering!  Mom was an amazing cook and grew everything from beans to rhubarb.  She even made her own ketchup!

 

I find it interesting that we are so focused on food and strongly opinionated as to what is best- who makes it best- and the cooking channel is watched as much as sports!  For years I’ve had my own opinions and vowed never to become one of the up and coming “only natural” gurus in our generation.  I love the saying “life is short- eat dessert first”.

 

My journey however took a turn where health issues were glaring and here I am today someone I do not recognize or know at all- someone who made an organic thanksgiving meal leaving out all organic sugar products.  I can’t afford it- the food is more expensive.  But I can’t afford not to because for me it is working.  I decided I wanted my life to be long!

 

Thanksgiving eve my daughter made four beautiful traditional buttermilk pies with everything “normal”.  She gave one away that night.  Most of the family added a small slice to my traditional breakfast (I ate organic oatmeal and yogurt).  After breakfast she gave her brother half a pie and her sister a whole pie to take home.   The rest was consumed by family and friends throughout the day and gone by the next morning!  It reminded me of my favorite Aunt- Aunt Betty.  She and I would sit at the dessert table at my grandmother’s house the Sunday before thanksgiving most every year.  We stayed until we had tasted all of the desserts and there were never less than 15 different ones to try.

 

Everyone really enjoyed my dinner and my niece even made her green bean casserole all natural in honor of the new tradition (inspired and insisted upon by the daughter who baked the pies!)  I was very happy and satisfied without even a taste of those pies- like I said- I don’t know this new me inhabiting my body.  I do know that miracles are still possible though and I thank God for this miracle He has given me- I can still work the “magic” and not lick my fingers!  (My thanksgiving miracle for 2012)  Who knows what the future holds - it matters not!  Contentment for today is a satisfying wonder………

Has personal quiet time become a luxury no one can afford?  If there is one constant cry heard daily across the land it is that life is just too much to handle and we want a break!   From the wife who is caring for her ill husband to the chief of police in the city the cry is the same.  Here are a few examples I see daily in this dilemma:

• Parents:  When the beautiful infant sleeps Mom sleeps or rushes to get caught up on the daily cleaning, cooking, washing her hair and on and on the list goes.  Being alone and quiet feels forever lost. This rings true for the growing number of Dads who stay at home.  The working parents have tripled the challenge!
• Students working, studying and often a parent too:  Juggling from wake up until sleep overtakes them there is a belief that life will never again include personal quiet time to just be.
• Professionals in Police, Fire, and the Medical community who carry responsibility for the lives of others:  There is a murder in our city almost daily.  Disaster situations are more and more prevalent.  The call to save, protect, and rebuild takes every fiber of human ability and often requires sacrifice of personal needs like sleep along with anything “normal” in life.
• Teachers of any age student:  Demands from government and administration are so heavy that the work of dealing with teaching the students and encouraging families to participate is horrifically compromised!  A job that in times past brought such fulfillment is now in the list of impossible jobs- they simply cannot meet all the demands and still reach out to individual students!
• You:  I daresay anyone reading this will say the life I live is on this list.  I didn’t leave you out.  Personally I do not know any person who has the luxury of consistent quiet times that are not challenged by issues of life that pull on them disrupting the quiet time immediately when it appears.

Add to all of the above the distractions of technology and I wonder if we have forgotten who we are and have become whatever it seems life dictates us to be any moment.  I found a reminder of who I am today while meditating this thought.  It also clarified why we have so much trouble being who we are:

1 What marvelous love the Father has extended to us! Just look at it - we're called children of God! That's who we really are. But that's also why the world doesn't recognize us or take us seriously, because it has no idea who he is or what he's up to. 2 But friends, that's exactly who we are: children of God. And that's only the beginning. Who knows how we'll end up! What we know is that when Christ is openly revealed, we'll see him - and in seeing him, become like him.  3 John 1-2  Message Bible                                                                                                     

There is no time in God.  Now there is something to hold onto- a timeless journey meant to be fully experienced- always time for everything He holds………………

 

The hidden tree.  All over the world you can find one.  Unique and special in its own personal beauty and yet hidden from view unless you make a special effort to find it.  If you happen to discover it you will be drawn to stand a moment to enjoy the pleasure its beauty brings.  I have one such tree in my front yard.  In these photos you can see the beauty of this tree- yet it is hidden from view except coming up the side porch entrance or looking out our front window.  Right now all the trees around it are still  green and people driving by can’t see it through them.
 

The enjoyment of walking around the yard shooting these photos (yes they are all the same tree- just featuring different angles and splashes of color) caused me to think about being hidden.  How many times have we been in a crowd and felt no one noticed we were there?  How often it takes years for employers to recognize the “jewel” in their midst as their focus is on production rather than those in the process that truly make it possible?  How many families have that one child who just doesn’t get the same attention as all the others and yet they have very special qualities?  I have been married many years and it never ceases to amaze me that I can learn something new about my husband still to this day- or come to appreciate something he does I have always taken for granted.

 

Today I am defining something hidden simply as something we are not looking for.  Many times I find myself so overwhelmed or so busy I don’t even look around.  Yet taking a moment today to explore my own front yard I found a reason to smile and appreciate “my world”.

 

 

“For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.”  Matthew 7:8

A promise to act upon no matter what the circumstances…….......................

Imagine.  Imagination.  A way to escape.  A way to hope.  The way to change.  How many times do we look at a child and wonder just what exactly are they thinking?  Their little minds are constantly looking, touching, exploring, and testing. We applaud each discovery.  When we are no longer a child it is easy to quit imagining.  Quit trying to learn.  Quit exploring and testing possibilities for our life.  This is the moment we no longer live, but give in to the lie that the day comes when there is nothing new and wonderful for us to find.  Limitations rather than possibilities frame our life decisions.              

So many circumstances can bring us to a moment like this.  Recently I found myself leaning toward that lie.  I experienced loss causing grief, physical issues limiting life, hurt from unexpected rejection, and shock and disillusionment when a battle won over illness in a family member that had given us two years of restoration and victory came crashing back.  I hesitate to be this revealing in my writing as often readers respond with sympathy or empathy rather than understanding my point.  You see I don’t consider my experiences to be so unique.  Most everyone I know has a similar list though the details are widely varied.  Whatever it is that challenges us to the brink of losing hope is not the issue- it is what we do when we find ourselves there. 

It is the children in my life that have shown me the way out.  Imagine possibilities.  Look around me and discover new things in life- new options!  Touch those around me and let them touch me.  Test the options and embrace those that work.  Receive the applause others give when I advance into the world I imagined. Rejoice in the fact that I am a child- God’s child.  I shall sing today the 3^rd verse of “This is My Father’s World”…. 

This is my Father's world.

O let me ne'er forget

that though the wrong seems oft so strong,

God is the ruler yet.

This is my Father's world:

why should my heart be sad?

The Lord is King; let the heavens ring!

God reigns; let the earth be glad!

 

 

It’s Sunday morning and I just don’t write on Sundays.  Yet here I am at the computer compelled to tell you the thoughts flowing through my heart early on this day.  I am a “church goer” person not because it is a commandment and I fear disobedience will keep me out of heaven- but because there is no where else I want to be on Sunday.  I long to be with friends who share my love for God and believe that Jesus made a sacrifice of himself because He loves me (and every other human he created).  I can’t wait to read Dr. David Jeremiah’s new book “God loves me; He always has and He always will”.  Everything and everyone has disappointed me at some juncture of life except this one truth and so at least for this day of the week I will stop and declare this is who I am and have been since I was eight years old.  That is decades of years I have never been disappointed, but rather amazed at the love of God that remains constant even in my worst moments.  He is the perfect Father who hasn’t missed even a second of my life.  There to shout the victories.  There to comfort my sadness.  There to cast out any fear.  There to heal my hurts.  There to joy in touching others lives.  There to laugh with me at the antics of my grandchildren.  There to direct me in times of confusion.  It is Sunday.  I will share this morning with those who also have a grateful heart and want to give thanks and praise to the God who desires that all man come unto Him and receive eternal life....(above picture taken two weeks ago with my pastor Don Blevins on his birthday)